Hi my bloggie...

Time to update since it was like quite dead... yaaaaa haha... life juz like tat ntg much, busy but lazy... and now feel like say sumthing from my heart...

For those who juz remember me last minute before the event start... i will juz say no, for me, ur not my true fren or wad ever la... bear in mind, who am i to u??? think...

I think wad suites me now is juz stay single... is better for me to proceed wad ever stuff without love distracting... that makes me concentrate... this coming christmass, juz with frens! I have made up my mind, wad ever i do is my destiny... most important i love it!

HIM, i guess ili i know who is him... He is a sucker, i hate him.... he is a bastard and all the bad kind...when need help, he treat u as god... when ur useless, ur a rubbish... why such ppl exist in human nature? i really dun understand...

and once again, merry christmass.... hohoho

All i can do is just drag...

I have 2 more semester to drag... How long can i go?? i duno...so far quite syok... Is all because of u!!! No more next time...

Hey papa Hey mama

Me here, ur son NG JIAN PIN is gonna make some decisions which will give u an heart attack...chill yea, i will tel u when the right time comes...

Back from death...

Everything is going abit fine... so yea, since my blog is gonna dead like anything, so im back here for something... which is the current post here... lolz...

He says

Im sorry...

September 14th year 2009 monday 3.59pm

Jian Pin is dead...

Hell there...

Still have more then 24 hours... Still moodless... ok, i can give a promise to pass or not! as time pass the more i scad...Hell ya scad!

SO yea as i knw is getting tasteless,dun feel like adding sugar or any conditioner... juz accept how it moves... Juz human nature's feeling!! Juz the word 'trust' can make it tastety...

Many ppl wanna know wad is pll... ok, Not a secret anymore, it means PIN LIVES LIFELESSLY

2 days left...

Judgement day

Gonna keee siao soon... Wad to do next, lots of thinking to do lately... but i juz say Hehehahahahahaha Ahhahahahahahaha.... juz for no reason.... == so wad do i?? im lame... And its me... Ng Jian Pin

4 days remaining...

Day by day liao... left 4 days, dying on those notes!!! my mind get distracted each time...ok, leave it to god,i've done my part... juz follow wad is fated! i will juz close my eyes n meditate b4 study, clear up my mind and start going! im not gona do things twice...

WM, i hope u wont mind i keep bugging u for account, i know sometimes is annoying... I feel rally bad, but if i did it, i will cum back and "pou tap" u... Thank you, but sorry for ur time...=)

I visited the blog today, ntg is done...
juz wanna be friends with her b4
proceed to another relationship
i cant lie myself anymore...
i've been saying this time to time,
i duno how to move, but to move..
i duno wad am i thinking now,
i hope im thinking the right wan...
and the past is all over....

Im so confused...

Can someone leads me? I duno wad to do... Exam is juz 7 days away, i need the inspiration... I need it to the subject which i dun like!!! God bless me...

I hope u understand my feelings... I juz dun wan to lie to both of u... Juz for sementara oli, after my exam ok?

wat i say oso u wont trust, i understand... Ya, we in the diff time zone, u free thn i not free, i free thn u not free... I wont push anymore furthur d... coz for wad i know is juz TRUST plays all this...

Ipoh...xD

Althought i've been there for less then 24 hours... But is awesome, hang around eat eat and eat but finally eat... lol Three reasons y i love this place:
1) This is the place where i grow up...(lots childhood memories there)
2)I can meet my beloved grandparents and childhood frens...
3)food there is super cheap, and many famous food can be found there... so eat with no mercy!!!

yesterday my dad rang up my grandparents and my grandmother complains that my grandpa cant control his emotion due to his eye problem(he is having glaucoma so his is having tunnel vision) which causes him cant see things well(kesian him)... So my dad was kinda worry and ask us to pack up rapidly and then hit back to humtown...

When we reach there, from wad i see is my grandparents was so happy for seeing us... Grandpa, ma, we'r back...

So after some chit chat, we went out for some food... yeah lol... ipoh is still the same but 1 thing that makes me dissapointed is the price for the food boosted so much... Kai si hor fun from rm2.50 to rm3.50?? can u imagine that? juz around 1 year the price increase rm1... speechless and eat... Wad to do? it taste good ma... then we had tougeh chicken too...

Till the night, i went to ipoh greentown yam cha with my cousins and hr frens and as well as wait for merdeka countdown... like around 11.45pm i keep looking at my watch and ppl around and see ppl( especially malays) get mad when the clock strikes 12am... Ya, they are some ppl mad... those motor cyclist, the wave the flag and mat rempit around the compound think around 40 bikes... is this call merdeka?? omgeee wad a shame for u all... and summore, oli these ppl were mad and celebrating... The rest of the ppl in the mamak stall and the whole street continue their conersation!!! == merdeka is so dull this year, like no ppl take it as sumthing but holiday for the day...

So for the next day, i slept till 11am... then went out for breakfast... so, we ate roast pork for our breakfast lol... Then we pack our dirty clothing and leave ipoh early coz due to the radio, the trafic is still smooth in the north-south highway... so yeah, have to say bye bye and my dad gave my grandparents rm1000 each for their expenses... i miss u all but i will be back end of next month...hehe

ok, so we head to gopeng 1st coz my dad wants to eat the curry mee there... after that next stop kampar to have fish ball noodles... But tday i saw something cruel done by ppl in gopeng... form wad i saw tday, they caught a life wild pig in the forest nearby and they brought it to a corner of a shop which is juz opposite the shop where ur having our meal... The kill the wild pig and chop the head off... Ewww, i cant really continue my meal... omg, the blood juz wissling and the whole floor covered with blood... Pittyfull , i can juz feel the pain...

After a heartache for the wild pig, we juz went off... thn straight head back to kl... Continue my movie "17 again" for the rest of the journey home...

To be honest or??

If i honest, i will hurt the person...
If i dishonest, the person will be happy with me...

Wad position should i stand? To lie? To be honest?
especially to girls... haiz haiz haiz...

Sry yy... I know sumthing is with u!! Nyway, i wont force u!!!
2 mins time is up... But i will choose to be honest... Wad i mean is, not becoz of ur hair... It wont affect anything...

Thx for everything u've done for me... I will treasure it all...

update for fun....

Ya, drop by to post something since it is quite dead.... lifelessing here on9... my 1st paper falls on 14th of sep and bs on 17th... long long way to go... Sienz...

Today's jian pin is already upgraded...

Haha, atleast today i've put something into my brain!!! Revision is great... Thx WM be my part time tutor...i will show u a B, i mean atleast lol...

Another good news... My evo3 has turned to dark blue...^^ wow, so cool... i love it so much... My very only dream car in arcade machine... == nyway, im already very happy with it... Gonna rock this world...$.$

Till now i can still sense u...

Tday i send chun and soon to ss2... After that, i have a strong feeling that makes me drive towards the park and my heartbeat speed is increasing... But i saw u from wad i tough and my sense!! Wad happen to me? Omg, 2 months and 3 days liao... I still have the same feeling during our meet up in the park...

I park my car a side... I look at u... with pw... To me, the park is short of me, but to u i dun think so!!! I went of rapidly b4 my tears drop... i will not torture myself... like i said i will walk away

I will be fine...

To my beloved DBU3 ex classmates

Thank you all of u for the belated bday supprise after 17 days... so touch!!! Happy bday soy... may this coming exam will be smooth for u... But also to all of u, god blessed and score... Praise all of u... =)

Exam... around ther corner...

Ya, exam cuming... Have to self quarantine d!!! Can pass?? Hope so... After exam, feel like going out station... life in kl is getting boring!!!

Till now i haven forgive myself and give myself a chance...

Meeting them tml, my old classmates for bbq... I recalled last year, if oli i could be with them now in sem4... Everything is ruined with my own hands, my attitute... till now i still cannot accept im a retake student... It makes me dun feel like going to class!!! heng is not going, soon i guess he will sleep till he reach wonderland... So, shall i go?

Being poor is sucks...

This few days... I come across to the stage where by "poor" Ya, poor, im poor now... This very month i over spend liao!! So, yea left 10 cents in my pocket... Today, went out lunch with meng and ray!! Wad can i do? watch thm eat lo... After that go old town for revision and meng guides me... She ordered me a pepsi and double toast kaya bread, she say for me coz i need food to make my brain works better... My heart was like feel awesome, coz i was terlalu hungry liao... I duno how to thank her... but juz oli a toast kaya bread warms my heart!! Realized tat when ur poor and hungry, watever stuff will be as delicious as abalone... Oli the poor will appriciate everything... So today i experienced that!!! Hope i will not be the poor when im out to working life... thx W.meng... :)

Fun sunday...

Well, kent organize an amazing race for our kdu group ppls... Thx kent for the hard work!! really like tat day... Haha, so total 5 froups... For my group, lol Elaine(leader), Tony, Wei kang and me... so yea... abit lazy to blog the whole days stuff... but its really fun... Lets skip to the end, we won second place and we are late for the finishing line for 45 mins due to the lrt technical prob...but we are the third team to arrive... lol will update more later... lazy ==

10th of every month...

I wil take this as the most important day in every month in future...I think, oli me will know the reason!!! I dun have the courage to know ur updates or view, feel heart sick... Need another month? hopefully only 1 month...

Im fine but sometimes maybe a lil bit down...

Malaysian is getting more like singaporean

Is tat a paper with a simple agreement and signature WITHOUT witness will proof everything...??? How about if the signature is fake?

Okok, lets say and make it simple... (example)Person A promise to pay B rm300 within a month, So B Make an agreement with a piece of White paper state that A will pay 300 to B within a month and ask A to sign to prove both parties agree on this agreement, If A Didnt make it, B will hand over this case to police...

Ok, now... Wad if A din pay and B report the police!! SO now, if u were the police, how do u solve this case?? With juz the piece of white paper of agreement the police can accuse A without witness? Does it make any sense? In reality singapore law yes... But for malaysia? I duno much about law... This is juz a example... And now my brother is facing this... So, how now? Do malaysia accept a piece of white paper for prove?

Empty minded...

Duno wad im doing this weekend... Seems tired and lifeless!!! And insomnia...
Parents not in good mood for days oso... Feels ransom...



Hopping for a better tomorrow...

Coursework 2 back...

28/50... Fark, my best d? or maybe even better? So now total 26+28=54 pass... juz pass omg... Ya, atleast i know i've done my best... ngam ngam pass izit meant to be? Juz being a fool around all this... ==




尽了全力,
用了势力,
有了希望,
换来绝望,
有意思吗？

To my dear brother yin...

I know it was not u... I know u wont do that... But, i duno y u hide it from us!! Hope things can solve very soon, u have ur important person supporting u... So, be a man and fight back and prove that ur not wrong... Im no longer help u always!!! Ur 16 now... So be a 16...

Izit im fated to be negative when i try to save?

When ever i try to save on something, things will becum negative... I duno y, isit fate that i cant save my money?? I have to get things in the expensive way?? If the fate can answer me, show it to me pls... Im pissed with all these things liao....

College life total upside down...

Today, woke up at 5.45am and get myself well prepared and confident for the tutorial answer to show my DAM tutor... I tot the answer was perfect unfortunately not!!! He look at my answer and say, "u have confident to score A? From ur answer i dun see any A" i was like ok, i will do better... Im glad he is concern me, but 1 thing i dun like about him is( he love to aim me, everything me me me) Fark la, i know im retake student and pls dun embaras me by asking me last years stuff lar... Im so dam pissed about pass year... Im good enough to answer u on last week's presentation, i've face a massive shame by answering ur bloody ques... In the class, so many ppl, and some of them are sleeping... Go question thm la m***er F**ker

I hate being a tarcian...doing things all alone now!!! My old friends were enjoying their college life...When cum across this( Jian pin, how was ur college life? How was ur result? Any fren can intro?) I duno how to answer... But, think about it, i am the 1 caused all this to happen juz becoz fail the bloody account and statistic... haiz, feel angry when mention all this... Hate mysef...

To me DBU3 is still the best, too bad, i've ruin my college life, no matter how i curse, sad, angry or pissed... Things will never be the same again... I need motivation...


Tml's hapiness depends on tday
Ensure urself better thn yesterday
keep on learning day by day
Will be someone in someday...

The day u die is the day u retire

Golf...

Starting to love this "RICH MAN'S SPORTS" zzz which i think is not...The most oli cost 10sen per hit?? Need a lil bit more practice then will be alright... Hope can hit 180m soon!! Thx hwa...

LEg...

Left knee and ankle is like loosen up up... Feeling it lately, scad it hurts again!!! Juz dun wan the history to repeat, It suck walking with crutch or limping and wear knee protector...

Haiz, try not to walk so much... Especially run!!! Think back, how i wish i can run with full thrust with no worries! however, my secondary wish already come true... Got 2 silver for 200m and 400m...

Thats for the past, Now, i cant really run...

Hang out the whole day...

Ray stayed overnight at my house... Due to too late and scad kena rob while he go home!!! Ya, sleep till the next day, My dad wish me happy birthday... Then he go to work, then till 11 i wake up!!! We went to OU shopping and arcade... Most of the time arcade zzz... Then we went bbq plaza for lunch... Time flies in OU... Around 4 pm i went home coz going for golf wif hwa... Pai seh, he belanja me and fetch me there summore... Lol, learned some basics from him and my luckiest shot is almost 150m... Fun, great sports to play...Thx hwa... will post the pics tml...

After this went to aunts house for dinner, my uncle give me angpau lol, syok!!!... THen fetch my bro to pasar malam... After he came back, he has a moody face, as usual argue again wan la... zzz

Sometimes i think, Y a couple will argue often after a long time of relationship?? SWt and wonder why, izit bored? or knew he or her bad characteristics? Or maybe argue is fun for thm == could'nt care much...

Later at night, went to william yam cha with church friends... Din expect they will give me a supprise!! so touch, Then they sing bday song for me...And i make another new wish :) this may come true compare to previous wan... @@ Thx wei kang... I love the cake... I love u all, see u all in wednesday... haha, prepare for water war... Bday boy always the victim lol...

Had a great time tday... Thx to all my beloved friends, thx god for all of u, thx for those supprise... Make it count, i will appricciate everything, every sec of tday...

Happy birthday to meeeeeeee......

Thx buddies...Lol, cigarette as the replacement of candle... @@
Cheese cake and sushi... Cheese cake made by ray and sushi by whey meng... Thank you ^^
Ray... me
The cake is too soft and we have to eat with spoons... So "hygienic" ==


Happy birthday to me... lol, We went desa park city and "picnic" Lol, was having fun... Ntg much to write...

Woke up early tday... ==

My American cousin rang me up tday... Lol, i was supprise tat she will call me... Erm, talk not tat long oso and duno wad to say... Mind was kinda blur!!! And im juz sorry, cant tell u much...

Windy saturday mainly waiting for my cheese cake...

Maybe tml, my cheese cake will be ready, im craving for it madly... Feel like going out tml night...."anyone?" I guess no... == nvm... Lonely, and sienz!!! As usual... Juz wan to thx my bro a million reason...Raymund, best fren forever, we ride together always... lol!!!

Quite satisfied with my coursework tday and i hope i wont let her dwn?? lol... Im doing quite ok lar, Thats already beyond myself after SOMEONE'S motivation...

Haiz... tday, i skipped church... Juz dun feel like going and went home do some work stuff... After that went 1U for chill out... feel tired and mind mess!! Sometimes i duno wad im thinking, Suddently will turn emo... Juz feel like sleep sleep and sleep... No need to fan anything!!

Erm... juz want to share something for those who visit my blog... Tday, in lrt, i saw a man pushing his mother on a wheelchair... The lrt was "poeple mountain people sea", And the man try to squeeze in to the train with his mum aswell... The old lady(mum), look from face i guess she's 70++... I look at her leg, omg, her feet's skin is already rotten and her hand is already like out of shape with bandage ... That moment, i look at her and feel very sad for her... And think, Y ppl will suffer with this? Izit everybody has to face it? Will i be like her after 50 years?(if i could live that long)After that, she smiled at me... I did the same respond too... If she could smile with her bad condition body, y dun me? I have no sickness, im healthy, i can run, i can play and i can do so many things...

(Yean yi, this is actually for u... I hope u will understand this post although the language and writting is not good enough... U tried ur best and u did well for tday's choir... I know how u feel for the 2nd place... And pls, dun cry for it, cry doesnt solve anything... Smile k?? smile, its over... Im trying to make u understand by telling u wad i experienced tday, if the old lady can smile, y dun u? Dun cry coz of the choir thing, u still have the chance to go for competition again... try harder next time) Im telling u this coz as a fren, I want u to be happy and feel better... I hope this will work... But is kinda childish!!! == haiz, i still have the same characteristic...

I juz want to let u know...

To someone out there... I hope u will see this!!! I will juz express wad i wan to say here, and im dam angry in this matter btw us...

Im glad yesterday u came and guide me bs... Im really sorry i didnt fetch u home tday, Honestly, i have fear on riding bike and with u behind me and send u all the way to puchong... I will get nervous and i dun die that fast... i hope u will understand!!! If u insist then i ntg to say... We draw a gap line, u walk ur own way and i walk mine... i know i owe u alot but as a fren, sumtimes i oli can help u till a limit... If i have a car then diff story... U can slam my door, u can bring my hse down... I dun like to see ur "black face"...

I hope u wont make me point u my longest finger, if i do? our frenship is over... And i mean it, im so god dam pissed for this few days... I will pay u back wad i owe u...

Change habit??

Wasting time online... Ntg much to do now, and ya... Will not be so often, maybe good for me? I will still blog daily... Blog is my friend :) Try to spend more time in acc and bs...

Sry Ray for ur car... I hope ur fine with it!!! Lol, tml cheese cake here i come... *o*

Stupid day...

Im really pissed for tday... And, i hate to rely on ppl but i have to!!! Coz of my bro, coz of my aunt, coz of my cousins... My car cant move again due to engine high temperature, so Raymund borrow me his car... But the bad thing is, i puncture hid car tire!!! Ok, nvm, summore im fetching sumone in car, so dam paiseh la... And i got very pissed!!! I suppose to fetch my cousin from school at 12.30pm but i manage to get there at 1 sumthing...

My skin were flaming, the the weather is terrible... Sweat like anything, wad a day!!!== changing tire under the sun is crazy...

I think im disturbing u all the time...

Wad can i say now... erm... ok, this 2 weeks im really happy to get to know u... I realized lots of things while doing comparison... Thank you very much for helping me so much and accompany me... So, good luck in this coming events... And sry i cant be there!!!

Today's u compare to the 1st day i know u is totally diff... Things will change :)

Just wanna say thank you for a million times...

Car overheated today...

Park area
Walk way
== Useless machine

As i drive back from college using MRR2, my car seems like have some funny reaction like losing power, noisy and so on... I looked at the temperature meter and i was like 'stunned' Almost H... Luck i was aware about it... If not? I cant imagine... So i was near kepong and i stop at desa park city( my fav place) At night will be romantic... ==

Day of the thursday ==

Tday, 1st thing i heard is my phone ringing... I got pissed because she destroyed my beautiful dream... So, juz get up and shut the alarm and bathe! It was 5.30am in the morning... After the everything and i decided to drive to college tday... Along the road, my mind plays the music and rhythm of Love story(taylor swift) And i sang the whole song zzz(LAME)

The road is smooth and juz cruise all the way there... Im driving slow and it takes almost 40mins to reach there! Park my car and walk straight to class... (blur)

For this few weeks Im suprise that my acc tutor look up on me so much, everything jian pin solve, jian pin present... so embarrassing, 1 ques wrong... Pai seh, infront of so many ppl... And he wan me to promise him to get atleast B for his sub... == wad is so special about me? Tell other student oso lar... in class not oli jian pin ok?? Not oli all this, He want me to do next week's presentation TODAY... And say, jian pin will be the 1st for this class, the rest do it next week... I was like omg, i haven even prepare anything yet... "go jian pin, juz present, juz speech, no need transparent paper and projector... == ok, then went out and bla bla bla and i wont post wad he ask and i i've presented... Then he passed me... @@ weird lo... I may find him personally...

After this, lecture hall... Sienz...

1st chinese post in blog...

一个无聊的故事

（小心！这是个无聊的故事）

狮子在森林里散步，走着走着，不小心踏到一些东西。狮子举起脚看，糟了！是乌龟的蛋！狮子

看到附近没‘人’（动物）假装看不见，走掉。

其实，乌龟爸爸在附近，只是凭着他细小的力量怎能和狮子理论呢？为了帮他的孩子报仇，于

是，他便在悬崖等待狮子的经过。。

老虎经过，乌龟跳下去！用他的龟壳撞老虎然后逃到河水里

“你以为你剃了胡须我就认不得你吗？”

老虎很不甘心，于是老虎在草堆里等待乌龟。。

小蛇经过，老虎伸出虎爪，爪伤了蛇

“你以为你脱了龟壳我就认不得你吗？”

小蛇很不甘心，于是在树下等待老虎的经过。。

小猫经过，小蛇伸出尾巴绊倒小猫

“你以为你装可爱我就认不得你吗？”

小猫很不甘心，于是在草堆等待蛇的出现。。

蚯蚓经过，小猫伸出猫爪，抓伤蚯蚓

“哈哈！夫债子还！！”

蚯蚓也不甘心。。

过后草蜢也是。。

后来连老鼠也是。。。

这个故事很难停下来。。

I accept the fact that I'm not special..
but I'm aware that I'm unique,
and so for every other people,
all of you are unique to me.

Final message for u...

I listen to it ,
Always remind me about you.
Although something goes wrong,
But i just wish is gonna be alright.( if i can)
I might not be perfect,
But i try to be one of it.
If not i am the one for you,
I will slowly walk away.

I heard new news... It match my prediction100%, i duno when u all started! But i know im stupid, i will try not to view it and know it... Young ppl are looking for fantasy not, they learn but sumtimes regret, i hope u will not regret like me... It sucks, really sucks... And it is not worth it at all!!! Im calm now and i will be wise... Im walking away slowly step by step. There is no point for me to sad, there is no point for me struggle with those feelings... I will take it as a lesson, im still young and still hav a long way to move!! But now, wad is existing now is juz memories... And congratulations... May he will be the one for u...

Sorry... for the past...age gap and no fate, i will accept, coz it is a fact!!! And i will move on... Im happy now and everything changed! So all the best... We have our way path now, Good luck!!!

Prove ur better then yesterday...

Juz think tat, short of sumthing in my life... Juz asked myself today, 'Jian pin, wad have u archieve after 18 years of living?' Can i say ntg? Nvm, i know myself well enough...

Everybody has 24hours a day... So, it depends how u use and maintain those time... For me, except study, sports, fitness center... wad else? Juz think that im wasting most of my time... Will be looking for something to learn and participate...

Music!!! Most of my friends having music root... But now, i feel like learning guitar!! I think, im being influenced!!! Will be looking for guitar class after my coursework2...

So many dam things i have to do...hope it is not too late... I duno wad to blog now, feeling pissed... lol

Tday??? Erm.. not that bad... Atleast can get to go out with ppl from diff college, Which is friends of Philip and Hui... 2 girls, 1 is philips gf!! So at 1st we met and introduce each other and later get ourself boring in mcD... Erm, yea abit of dissapointment, after the meal, we line up to buy movie tickets... Such a long q but expected becoz is sunday... And unfortunately, student card are accepted during weekends.. So, pay more!!! Harry potter, erm, for this time, this show is abit bored but more funny compare to others... Good starting, but a stupid ending, dun really understand the movie... It took almost 3 hours to end this show,so the last 1 hour, me n hui were not really in the mood to watch... The show ends at 5.50pm so we leave... While approaching the exit, so saw those couple seats in the last lane and i recalled sumthing by juz staring it for 2 sec...(which i think the promise is broke) My mind whispering to myself "Dun be stupid, She broke ur promise" ok, so i juz walk rapidly to the exit... Haha, im going to watch H.potter with yi again next week...

Reach hum at around 6.15pm and my dad was washing car... I came back with my bike, so my dad say, 'ya, since ur back, wash the bike aswell' i was like swt... If i dun move, he will keep nag nag and nag... so move my lazy bone and get the cloth and soap... Wash or not oso makes no diff... The bike still remain the shinny... wad to do? juz to shut my dad's mouth!!!

Next week, (begins tml) will be a tough week... I need sleep!! Feel tired easilly and i duno y? weather too hot? maybe... Coursework coursework, it will never ends... Bs, too many simbols, formula and steps... For me is juz crazy... i got 26/50 for my coursework, depressed, juz becoz wrong calculation...

Tday, me and yi talked about pasta... And so it happen im having pasta for dinner due to my parents craving for it so sudden... == nyway, i oli ate meat ball pasta for dinner!! for my parents? Seafood == I cant eat seafood coz chicken pox is recovering... omg, i cant tolerate without seafood... And, me and my bro planned, after 3 months we shogun for japanese buffet... so by the time, eat till satisfy...

Yi, lol... so u owe me a plate of pasta? ^^ haha, who ask u can cook better thn me?? lol, jkjk... Im jk but i still wait for it... Too bad coz im very the 贪吃...

Saturday which has 48 hours... Nice 1

Tday ya, woke up dam early for lecture... I set my alarm at 5.45am... But my class is on 9am... So, feel very lazy and soft boned... I slept at sofa yesterday cause due to too many mosquito in room... So got fedup and went downstairs and sleep sofa!!

So next day, ya normal, leave hum at 7am... Thn reach college and attend college... Class were so bored and everybody is in a sleeping mood.. haiz, wad to do? who ask tday is saturday morning?

Lol, went smkdj tday coz of sumone... my very very 1st time step into dj... But compare to my ex school taman sea, taman sea is sucks... Dj is much more cleaner and more greenery... I had fun tday... Playing with her, she's cute and active... haha, but 1 thing, she love throwing the wet and black cloth at me == hahaha, i 忍... lol!!! Copy ur cat...

Then, left dj school thn go lunch at ming tien And i ate the wrong food, forgot i got chicken pox but juz on recovery stage, omg, hope everthing is fine...So have a chit chat wif whey ming, wai hong and raymund... Lol, i can feel tat hong is a bit pissed due to the politics btw meng? I duno... Lol

After that, went home and i slept in my bro's room with my beg on top me... Too tired, + the weather is so dam crazy so tired + tired= even more tired... Sry Y.yi, din reply u and make u wait... hehe but nyway, tday i Furfilled my promise... I finally made myself smile... Through the heart... :)

Update?Short Note?Kind soul?

You know,

this blog is sooo interesting.

Because its my blog,

and i like it!

*jumps up and down like a kid*

woops.. am too tall. will hit the ceiling.

and oh my gosh, i can hear YY, saying : you crazy ah?? you want your head chopped off is it?? i take cane then you know.

XD

JP, you know what you mean right??

okay la.. its not me here la. its YY updating for him la.

joke of the day:

'ur very cute!'

'how?'

'dont know.'

'i slap you.'

----

okay not a joke, just a funny conversation.

Tday was awesome... This is wad i wan in my life...

Thx to huey ling... I get to know more ppl... I guess i will catch up more on them!! So erm, christian fellows... I think, i may go approach christian? I duno, i feel great while with christian group... Not juz tday,but each time i join thm... So shall i?

I talked to couple of them and share experience, like study life, love life, family... and much much more... we had games, song session and bible talks... After listening tat, i get to unsderstand more bout LIFE...

Kinda lazy to blog anyway... But, seriously i feel awesome tday... I know, alot of grammar mistake above... nah juz leave it, im tired now and feel like goin to bed...

Happy birthday Claris... Erm, im a bad cousin who duno how old r u lol 4 or 5? hehe nvm, and sorry i cant attend ur bday dinner tonight coz im going to KDU for gathering night... hehe, wish ur cute always and grow up pretty...

Ok, towards my feeling(soul call 6 sense...) They've start moving... Haha, i dun give a fucking dam anymore! Wanna go? go lar... hahaha, so wad? Actually, i should be studying now, juz take some minutes in my life to blog here... Get very sick and sien with the formula... Hopefully the exam ques will be simple... Ya, tday is friday, cool... Going for a spin this midnight if im allow to go out! Ya, after my exam, im going to KDU's gathering night... Thx to huei ling??? lol!!!

Yesterday went pasar malam, then yam cha in kayu with H.ling, tracey, jethro, Hazel and cheng ghee... Juz normal, talk lame and smile, laugh!! Then i went home early coz tml exam...== exam sooooo 扫兴...

(time for lame) Sometimes i will think while i see, My own brother of mine... How i wish if i were to be him...Y? If u were my true friends u will know y...I've seen truly through my own eyes...

Birthday is coming, feel like going to genting on that day... erm... see how is goes 1st... Planning to bring Myself for a chill out... I will be busy till next tuesday so by tat time slowly think about it... And i dun wan waste my teenage life, so travel xD

Lol, Y.Yi I owe u alot...

Hehe, thx for all this, i can say this is wad i wanted all this while... The blog is really awesome, its beautiful!!! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU... But i feel like a banana coz i duno how to decorate my blog... lol, yeah i slept at 2 sharp but now woke up and study again, i feel unwell coz scad mental block...(== im blogging for awhile) But, the chat box, i really want it but just cant subcribe!! TT nvm, i'll try to do it myself!! keke, juz feeling great and now raining+ strong wind... Feelling great in the condo... I guess im ready for exam soon!! I will owe u a meal soon xD.. Juz too confident ==" (confident usually is not my style) 

i will try to get the ear ring for u if i could find the tree tree shop... lol, kk, gtg and im gona stop here... tata night...  ;) thx oh...

Since june 20...

There are many things i cant really understand and solve... Juz like 1by1 happening consistantly, is my life end up on my own? I cant find any fun in college... Those friends are like steping back away and away from me... So now, questions runs on my mind! Wad can i do next? Shall i change college? Shall i give up my current course?(if i do, how im gona tell my parents? how do i discuss with them?) Shall i join leo pji?(can i sacrifies every saturday for it?)

Yean yi, wad u told me is true... But how im gona start? Yes, i feel better after chatting... If not u my phone will remain silence... If u think im always lazy to msg u its ok... And im sorry, my mind is in mess... And im sorry for the late reply...I hope u will understand...

Tday, i went to wei soon's house, i tried to ask him to lead me some account stuff... But end up he were juz trying to lure me to cc... He was my good fren but after entering college, he changed! I helped him alot b4 he got a room to rent... When he need help, he treat me as god... I dun take this as good fren anymore... dissapointed...

Friends with diff frequency wont last long... It works in every sector!

Yeah, i wont care, i dun view, i dun bother anymore... I've put love a side( it is a slowest suicide) Yean yi, i'll prove it to u, so u owe me a meal?? lol... I wont view anything about her:)

I tried to sign in for the MME... But i cant get it coz im still with P license and lack of experience... WTH, make sense meh? I really serious into it... I cant wait for 2 more years man... haiz... Nvm, i will be back in 2 years time... I juz love speeding...

Since saturday...

People are nw soooooo busy... Nobody wan to hang out? Dam sien...All giving excuses... Ok, after my bro's chicken pox, im going back to ipoh... I dun find any entertainment here... I guess ipoh is my town...

My 2 brothers kena chicken pox

Im seriously sorry to my 2 brothers... 1 is my own brother and 1 from another mother...i understand those feelings if it were to be me i'll go crazy... Anyhow, im sorry... Im the desease bringer... zzz Kesian u all...

Having a good weekend...

This weekend is quite fun... My relatives and cousins came for 2 nights in my house... So, is abit noisy but its fun... So this weekend is not so boring...Then we hang out alot, Shopping, and so on... But 1 thing, my chicken pox juz recover so i cant eat crab... So during the eating time(dinner lunch) I oli see thm eat those delicacies... Especially crab... Ya, im talking crab here...

I guess something is going to happen...

I cant care
I cant control
I cant stop
I cant do anything by watching it happen soon... I cant get angry, i cant sad, i cant take it

I stop myself for doing it but i still do it... Is love that powerfull can control people do beyond themself? Im juz very stupid, I wanna give up but i cant do it... I can feel they are something is pulling me to do wad im not suppose to do... i know and i've got alot of advice, i know wad is right and wad is wrong to do... I know im 18 this year, im big enough to think... i know study is important, i know she's gone and will never be back, i know we must think positive, i know i must not waste time, i know i know i know everything i know... But i duno y i cant do it? This shows that im strong or im weak?? I can say im week, i cant control my emotional, things can pull myself dwn juz a "flick" I need to know how to be strong... Must i need that much time to forget? sumtimes i feel like hit somthing on my head so that i can forget everything in pass... I know it sounds stupid, crazy and insane... I wont do that and never do that but i feel like doing it... haiz...

Can i trust again? Can i still accept lies from myself? can i still control myself for not being too into it? I dun wan to be serious... I wan to change to be a better man a more mature guy... Nobody can help me but myself, juz need time... 1 year? say yes if the will power is there...

I want to go to DESA PARK CITY...

After 2 weeks of chicken poxs... i didnt go there... I miss that place so much! The reason i like that place is becoz, the pond and the view calms me down! I remember whey meng brought me there when im totally falls in sadness, depress, moodless... terrible conditions! She drives me there... then we took a walk along the park which surrounded a pond... after that we had a sit... I look at the view of the greenery and the wind blows quite strong and the water is drifting along the stones... I feel relaxing and i tend to forget the sad stuffs + she talks to me and cheer me up... makes me feel very much better! I din know malaysia have such beautiful place... But now, i would love to go now, im having a lil heartsick...

My phone is not entertaining me now...

She is silent for now... She's juz like a dead phone, which i always expect sumthing to make me happy or cheer me up... She brings back the sadness mostly from inbox and songs, ur not with me from now... I juz treat u as a communication tool and thats it... Back to few years ago, im a cell phone expert, i solve frens phone problem... Phone was my fren, best fren... but now, i dun need u anymore!!! Things change, maybe phone is not my entertainment tool for me, age18...

I've tried my best... Juz to save a friendship! Its ok wad choice u make... I respect ur choice!!

Finally, i can go out without worries... Tday is a great day, went one u for chill out!!! Wangan midnight, began to love it... But its costly i know, wad to do? NIce ma... Tday went to clinic to extend mc... omg, the doctor was like so lan si... Nvm, fine, i juz wan tat mc... But lucky he din charge me... So the 3 days mc is foc lol... SO goin back to college in thursday! feeling cool and hope everything is ok... Tday, i wan to thx philip, I hope i will treasure the chance u gave to me...

To YL

What i did i never regret... I hope u too! I hope my post on that blog can make u clear... We are friends!!! =) i dun wan an enemy in this world... Hope u will still update the blog... Part of it is yours...

Sunny sunday??

I slept oli 2 hours... I cant sleep, my brother was on phone wif a girl for the hell of 4 hours.... OMG, so many things to talk meh... I heard the conversation... they are like wad ever crab oso talk... Yin, i salute u!!! And ya, my uncle sleep with us in the same room coz he come and visit us... Wad a miserable night, on my left, my brother talking, on my right, my uncle snorrrrrrrrrring..... How to sleep? So i manage to get myself to dream around 5.30am and i woke up & sumthing... Then i went for a bicycle ride in the park...Im so tired!!! After the breakfast, my uncle left and my family and i went hum!! My bro went for badminton and i have to stay at home "kemas rumah""gotong royong"wif parents!!! Great, i suppose to sleep but.... haiz

I think my mc is goin to extend, My face is still too horrible to go out! Im gonna get mad if the folowing days im still must stay at home... Im fine now but juz my face...omfg, im like a prisoner!!! zzz wad the hell...

Today suppose to be a important day... But is a bad day...

Well, wake up alone again... 1st thing i see is contact list, then i press L! So may i proceed? I told myself no, cause is over... ok, juz off my phone and get off! We are now like enemies, i duno how to start a friendship with u, my impression juz gone towards u... Like juz wad i know, a glass break and can never be fixed back to the original! Juz the time, which i can truly forget what is love... LOve is slowest suicide method... I leave it on fate now, if we are friends then so be it, we are not? I cant do anythings... Juz let the wind judge the direction! Im tired, bored and sick enough!!!

This morning, Heng rang up to me and said(Jian Pin, My introduction and ur essay they done themself d,our wan juz no need to hand it to them...) Worst thing is, i din do anything for the group and i get marks?? i feel so unfair and guilty... I duno wad happen next... Me and heng juz did nothing for them... Pai seh leh....

Its has been 8 days, omfg, I have been at home for this 8 days! The boredom is killing me... And i duno y i can juz get angry easilly? I think hot wether? bored? Haiyo, Began to take this world is the most boring planet...I've got so pissed... After my recovery, im going to ipoh no matter how...I need kampung fresh air!!!

I hope it wil be better then current...

Account assignment, My task SUPPOSE is to do the prime entry! But end up i do essay.. I dont even know who are my groupmates omg... Isit becoz i seldom go to college? seldom in class? or wad? everything need to collect info from heng... omg, jian pin, wad r u doin? Social... Ya, social? how to start? through conver? wad to ask then? Shit... Holy shit... Assignment is almost ready to hand up but im sleeping at home with chicken pox... Omg, the more i think the more question mark in my mind!! I wan to know, WHAT AM SUPPOSE TO DO NOW NEXT?? i really hope next time things comes at the right time...

what info that have you learnt??
how do u learn?
how does the info help u to appriciate subject ABFA 1013 IA?

Well, Good question! I think im the wrong person to ask... What info you have learnt?( actually, i dont know much and if can i dont want to know about account at all) How do you learn?(Mostly, force myself to do some excercise to make me memorize but i dont know what is all about) How does the info help u to appriciate subject ABFA 1013 IA?(Well, i never appriciate subject ABFA 1013 IA! I hate it... I will kick the founder's ass) Thats my answer, what every in the assignment, im lying... Haiz!!!

ZZZ, alone at home again! But this time i can move myself so can independent abit... Thx mum for taking care of me! Bad news now, my wound is getting ichier... Omg...haiz 5 days i hav not be out from my house dont know wad the world is happening... except news... Now i know how bored for those old folks who always stay at home...

Phew...

Im much better now, Think it is on the recovery stage...Hope it cure as fast as i expected!!! But now eating is hard for me, each time i swallow my food, my throat is giving the pain! So , i cant take solid food yet... After recovery, 1st thing to do is eat... Buffet lol...

Wow, third day of chicken pok... I juz cant sit and sleep still! For these 3 days, i din sleep well, wake up almost every 1 hour thn isomnia... zzz Im so tired but the iches juz makes me cant go to sleep! Now my face looks so terrible... Especially my nose, swell (I got a shock while looking at the mirror) omg, hope it will turn back to my original face... TT

Hard time june july...

Lol, chicken pok... So hard to stand the pain and ichiness!!! Lol wad to do? Once in a life time... Ya, june july for me are hard months... Many things happen!!! Ya, tend to be wise thn last time!! Next 2 days coursework liao... I hope i can do it, its time to put dwn sadness! Having Chicken make me realize sumthing... lol

Is been 10 days has gone... Things still remains like tat!!! I juz want a natural smile on my face. Is tat very hard?? I juz duno wad the f*** i wan, who the f***i am, Why the f*** i live in this world... Everything is juz a question mark... Cant i juz can have a full stop?? Seriously, im in the dilema now!!!

Wow, god blessed me... Nearly got an accident tday!!! Was speeding...Nyway, i love it...Now is Juz like this, tday at subang bridge, theres an L shape turn... I was doin quite fast for the sake of "FUN" ( on depress mood)... 5 persons in car... It started like this, i made the turn and after juz a second, i feel things not right and i hop on the brakes... Juz tat moment, the car skided! I got a shock and and i turn more on the stering wheel and release the brake, and the car manage to get back on lane... Is juz around few mm to hit the wall!!! The view was like in the glow and miraclelly i see things goin slow... Lucky i release the brakes... OMG, after the turn my body was shivering... I feel the danger!!! In the car was like a complete silent during the turn but after tat... I can hear my fren saying, JIAN Pin u crazy ass.... Wtf, wah, and so on... zzz Nyway juz an experience... But now i think is fun and lovable!!! I feel better after depress... And now, i will put my life on the steering wheel... JUz feel like doing things that i like...

Omg, tday juz bored from sky to hell.... Bs lecturer is juz simply erm suck!!! How am gona cope??

Tday...

Yesterday, i told myself to wake up at 8am thn prepare my stuff and 1 dota game then head to 1 u for excercise in celebrity fitness... I suppose to do that but... okie, begin like this! I feel annoying when my phone ring ring and ring... I snoz it and i feel very tired and lazy to get up from my Bed... So i slept again till 11... Then rain, great, i've no car... Juz stay at home... Bored, and i ate my lunch at mcd...after that, went home dota!!! My mind juz in mess, i dont even want to think...Coz, she plays in my mind.. Ok, lucky, hwa call me for a drink then basketball... Is a nightmare for today, i noticed my stamina gone and im so NOOB in basketball... I need practice!!! Juz practice.. But im afraid my leg will hurt again... I think is not fully healed yet... I duno how...

Looks like im wasting my time... Week 5, juz oli know a few things, yea, things 1 by 1 happen lately... Especially my family, tday juz kena scold and lecture for nothing! But, i know more about myself a lil bit... So, god, r u playing me or lecturing me?? Lol, I went to Kepong desa park city... Look at the beautiful pond, im alone but i can calm myself down!!! Thx whey meng, for the 1st time u brought me there, i will set that place for my chill out place... A few ppl to thank you... Expecially whey meng, u wake me up to becum a better man... And yea, through scolding ==" haha, nyway, i owe u all alot... tqtqtqtqtqtqtqtqtq

Ok, is over... I will remember it always!!! This place has no happiness for me... I wan to get out... Restart again my life...

5 days, u din update the blog, r u forget or u dun dare to see?? I hope u will keep ur promise...

Sorry mum... My heart is in mess...sorry for making u angry, Juz sorry... I need time...

I've think think think and think... I juz duno how to start, i still think of u!!! i dun have the inspiration anymore... I cant focus anything.... Carying the suck feelings everyday... I cant go on anymore, Im dwn... Till to the bottomness

Smile...

They are reasons to smile... I juz wan to smile!! Lol, lame... want to smile ma, see cartoon lo... or? watch 1 episod of mr.bean...I will smile when i blog...

FOREVER

I came across something... Forever is a lie in the human nature!! Truely experienced... But google said, forever exists juz 3.763% in human nature...Mainly, (respect) Example, genting will always reminds ppl about lim goh tong! It can be forever... Respect takes 3%, mostly for ppl who r famous...0.763% is (love), example, Romeo and juliet, leong sam pak and zhu yin tai and so on... Love last till now... Isit true?? Forever isit true in human nature??lol, curious

Ya, im going to go ahaed towards my dream now... I will try to put down sadness and change to be a new man!!! I take as yesterday's jian pin is dead!!! Welcome to my new life... Hope it works!!! Juz say yes but can... lol

!st Posting...

Erm... ya,have my very own blog now haha!!! Can express and write things all about myself here... lol